NOOOOOOOO!!

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Crying While Eating

Funnily enough i`ve never considered this a dining style that i would favour.
Now,i have consumed some real delights, but having said that there has been some pretty shocking meals along the way .
None have made me hysterically upset thou`


Apparently this phenomenon has become the lastest internet cult, check the link below for more details.



cryingwhileeating.com

Where'd the cheese go?

I DON' KNOW

Dub Selector

This site combines the wonderfull worlds of cricket and dub styles,

click on a track,( the third one really does it for me ) choose a loop, then play with the mildly cricket related graphics to make your own dub version.

BO

an`ting .

shame there aint a sample of richie beno talking so you can mix that in too, but hay i`m always on the want .


click here BO

Power to the Cabbages

Ever needed a Cabbage converter ?

well if you do i have the very thing right here.

The page that turns you into a cabbage

egullet

I love winding the people up on egullet, egullet for those who dont know is a worldwide cooking/restaurant/foodie forum, they are by far the cutest bunch of nieve pricks that i have ever encountered.

I very occasionl post in the vancouver forum, and recently i had a post deleted from a thread intitled " Truth be told: Where've you eaten lately? ",
as i contained the following line " hmmmmmmmm i love eating out eh "

the following is a message from some bald guy who gets very wound up about those very words

" Transfattyacid,

I've just deleted your re-post.

The issue with your post is the "eating out" line - I think that's pretty obvious by now. Had this recent post been your first post, I may have let it go. But as this is your second post, with the same message I asked you to remove the first time, the end result is the same.

I'm giving you the benefit of the doubt here. I may not have explained myself well last PM. The choice is yours.

Please PM me if you need any clarification.

Thanks,

Arne


QUOTE
Phnom Penh

me and the missis had dinner here last week , after loads of hype from my work mates and seeing that you lot kinda like the place too , i thought we`d give it a go .

i think i must be missing the point . i found it pretty pedestrian . maybe we didn`t order the right stuff , if thats the case then whats it doing on the menu. and the service , well gee i thought we must have insulted them somehow to achieve the level that we recieved .

but having said that we did order a plate of anchovy beef on my work mates instructions, which i would discribe as a medium light to the meal .

the anchovy beef did end up providing the nights entertainment tho` . after the server tried to put us off ordering it . but it proved too much for wifee as she kinda stopped eating after a few tastes. i inquired as to why? as i was enjoying the raw beef that had been rendered a pale pink from lime juice and pounded with anchovy fillets. and cut to flat and fleshy strips. " i`ll tell you later " she replied .

Ubergeek keyboard

fancy a keyboard with NO markings on the keys being a good thing ??

well this one is supposed to inprove your typing hmmmmmm.


linkage

R2D2 must be a guy

The bleeping midget robot shows Luke and Obi Wan the wrong message.


take a look here

The Marijuana Conspiracy

The words "Marijuana" & "Conspiracy" go hand in hand.
Smoke some marijuana and pretty soon you end up talking about some conspiracy theory maaan.

but aside from that stereotypical analogy there does seem to be a worthy story behind this, read from the page linked below, to find out about the reasons behind marijuana`s illegality


The Marijuana Conspiracy

Latest Addiction

It has no caffeine content, nor does it resemble a plate of eggs benedict what so ever.

But it is fun to play, have a go here , football / bumper car crossbreed of a game

Kitten war

Shame this site aint what you might be thinking , theres no uzi automatic tooting kitties to be found, which was a dissapointment to me.

This is altogether more tranquil, and awwwww inspiring
Kitten War

The world in statistics

Genuinely interesting page that gives a running
counter on all the important world statistics:





click here


oh and don`t get paranoid

Dog Powered Scooters

go figure ?

Linkage

RingTones

In the good ol`days, the reason for phone`s "ringing" was so you could here the damn thing from any where in the house. i`ve never really understood why cell / mobile phones should also have to ring. as they are by definition always close to you and, with all the noise pollution in the world these days why add more to the cacophony ?. In the light of what humankind is capable of, can`t we figure out some thing less annoying than the RINGTONE!.

how did this happen ?
why as an evolved civilization do why need the ringtone ?

if you share my views on this matter you will find this link very special indeed. if you dont then fuck you, you need to know how annoying they are to millions of people



Fucking Ringtone

This summers must have item is ...

One of these bad boys



check `em out

Pot Noodle makes you impotent

No. It`s the lager ! .

Pot Noodle, for those of you who remain blissfully unaware of this English delicacy, is probably the single most disgusting thing you can ever dream of having to eat. It`s normally consumed by lager fuelled students and those who simply don`t know any better.

British tv adverts, for those of you who arn`t bombarded with them daily, are very funny.

take a look at this precious clip HERE

Really Crap Joke

Count Dracula is out "on the pull" in Glasgow.

He spends the night drinking Bloody Marys in various clubs and biting on
unsuspecting women's necks.

He is heading for home, wandering along Argyle street sometime before
sunrise.

Suddenly he is hit on the back of the head. He looks round and sees
nothing. He looks down and sees a small sausage roll. Mmm, he thinks.
What's going on here.

A few yards further on and ........Bang ! He's smacked on the back of the
head again! He whirls round as quick as he can - nothing. Again he looks
down and there is a small triangular sandwich lying on the ground. How
odd!

A few yards further along the street and........Crash! He's smacked on the
back of the head again!! He whirls round as quick as he can - nothing.
He's getting really angry now. Again he looks down and there is a cocktail
sausage lying on the ground.

He stands and peers into the darkness of the night. Nothing.

He walks a few yards further on when he gets a tap on the shoulder.

With a swirl of his cape and a cloud of mist he turns as fast as he can.
He feels a sharp pain in his heart. He falls to the ground clutching his
chest, which is punctured by a small cocktail stick laden with a chunk of
cheese and a pickled onion.

On the ground dying, he looks up and sees an attractive young female. With
his dying breath he gasps, "Who the hell are you ?"





"Hi, I'm BUFFET, the vampire slayer !"

Star Wars merchandise

I think it got out of hand years ago, but check this one out.
as quirky as your gonna get.

Bacon Bandages

Oh my, these are kinda surreal. but strangely desirable , especially to the cooks amongst us

take a look here

ill thought out company names

i`ll admit this is very juvenile but i found this very funny,

ARCELIK

KOC HOLDING GROUP

ASS TRANSPORT

WTF PROPERTY

Japanese robo-cat

Remember the rubbish animatronic cat in
Sabrina the Teenage Witch? Well, the one in
this advert is from Japan, even less life-
like and a lot more sinister.

Creepy Pet Video

you will need quicktime for this one

Squirrel nutter

Demented Dolly Parton-lookalike Kelly Foxton
has an unhealthy relationship
with her pet squirrel "Sugar Bush". She dresses
him up in all kinds of stupid outfits - like
Beatrix Potter for white trash. What makes
this site especially disturbing is the stab
at topicality, with tributes to 911, the
war in Iraq and Tsunami victims.
take a look

Election Results

Its kinda weird living abroad when there is a general election back home. Not that it makes me feel disenfranchised, i leave that to important stuff like Muller fruit corners and Marks and Spencer underwear.
The smart people amongst you could be able to tell that i`m not that bothered about politics. I couldn`t even tell you the name of Tony Blair`s opponent, this time or 2000-and-whatevers.
Who ever it was try again next time. ( like they need me for encouragement )

btw, 62% turn out in my home towns constituency, maybe there`s more of us that have *$#@ed off than i thought, or equally as blasé about which utterly dull guy ru(i)ns the country.

What is cool about elections is the graphics and stuff that let you know which areas have all the toffs, fence sitters and lefties.
like this one
Not that i let colours rule my life but, i used to work in the blue and live in the red, purely by chance ( and economics ).

Music Videos

i am always left kinda confused about music vid`s , i`ve never been a big one for watching telly too much and, err well music is for listening right ?

Ok, so there has to be a few exceptions to the rule here UNCLE`S - "Rabbit in your Headlights", and some of the SQUAREPUSHER / APHEX TWIN videos have added more to the experience than some canny visuals, and i ve just seen the GORILLAS - " Clint Eastwood" vid and that was kinda cool .
But to be honest i`m sure most vids are a vehicle for shifting product as opposed to art embellishments in their own right.

anyway i found this Blog and if your into your vids then its worth checking out.

Crap joke

I was in a pub yesterday and the cigarette machine
said "You smell and you're ugly"

Then I heard a voice coming from a nearby plate
of peanuts saying "You're a very handsome young man"

Turns out the cigarette machine was out of order
and the nuts were complimentary.

Geek site du jour

Ever wanted to know who has sampled who ?.

Well this is your site. with a handy " View by sampling artist" button, (bottom left under the site counter), which lets you browse your favourite artiste to find out who they have been ripping off.

Pretty soon you are sure to hear " goddamn some one owes me money i was correct that Tribe Called Quest used the fabulous "hard times "- Baby Huey in the remix of `can i kick it ?`" in conversations near you

www.the-breaks.com

You might not be a trekkie , but ...

..if listening to William Shatner singing "lucy in the sky with diamonds" fries your bacon then check this page out

Learn to disco

Why don`t you get down and learn some damn disco moves you lazy bunch of geeks



learn disco


this file is big so it may take some time to run ,

Quote of the day

"Religious war is killing people for having different imaginary friends" shivo







nuff said

More Breakdancin`

i love watching breakdancing, plain and simple.





Just watch this

The Corporation

Before i say more , or indeed to much on this one, i feel the need for a mindlessly dull disclaimer , for i`m no hippy people , not in the slightest, i will go on record as having never hugged a tree, ever.

As some of you may be familiar with a past trait of mine as being a label whore ( yes past trait, good people as i have been finding it all tirelessly pointless in my married 30 something incarnation ), a wandering billboard for others has been getting very `92 for me in recent years.

But , having said that the pursuit of profit, both personal and professional has had a strong hold on my work ethic for the last 17 years. I must also say that after watching "The Corporation", i`m kinda envious of my lovely wife as she has a blossoming career within the non-profit sector.

I`m also struggling with my ideals of ambition and prosperity for the wife and i, as "The Corporation" turns the high street on its head, and about time too.

does wanting a new flat screen monitor make me a bad guy ?

and i find myself wishing that i didn`t crave starbuck`s lattes so damn much , and there was a convenient alternative but hey thats another issue .

but i`m just a cook , right ? . one that has been favouring independent business as an employer.


anyway enough of my hang ups go watch the damn film for your selves, and a big thank you to the great fava bean philosopher himself for recommending this as essential viewing , cheers GB

www.thecorporation.com

Guys , this is an outrage to our civil liberties

" A Spanish designer has come up with what could be the perfect solution for the woman who feels frustrated that she has to do all the house chores."


Read on

Arse/Face Soap

two sided soap , with subtitles for the hard of thinking


you need to have a wash look no further